What is Yoga 308

Life is a constant struggle of balancing our body on both a physical and emotional side. Through yoga I have learned several life lessons. Yoga 308 is a goal I set for myself to do at least 60 minutes of yoga for 6 days a week for the next year. I invite anyone to join me on this adventure as I blog about some of my daily experiences. This is not intended to show that I have found peace and tranquility, but rather give my honest feelings of my journey. Enjoy.

Tuesday, April 9, 2013

Day 247 - Listen and Be Gentle

It is day 4 here at Samahita Retreat in Thailand.  I am loving what I am learning. When I leave the class I want to try some of the postures again.  This trip has changed my practice to make me feel like I am moving in a forward direction again.  I want to continue the Mysore style Ashtanga classes when I return back to Orlando.  Being here has shown me how sloppy I have gotten in my practice, and also a renewed excitement.

I have been concentrating a lot on not tensing my butt during a lot of postures, which in return gives me a new space to work with during things like upward dog and back bending.  I also have found a whole new muscle that I should be using during back bending.  Simple little modifications from an instructor is exactly what I needed.

I continue to talk about how I am looking to be more gentle with myself here in Thailand.  I have found this more challenging during practice when the instructor is watching you during the Mysore class.  She makes constant adjustments.  She told me once during my forward fold "Be Gentle,"  as I was forcing myself into the pose.  She also told me "Listen to what I am saying."

These have been two things that have been a life long challenge with me.  I am very demanding on myself, and I also feel like I should be able to accomplish the things in life on my own.  When given an option to do a project in school solo or with a group, I always choose solo.  Job reviews would always tell me I need to ask others to help me with my projects.  I know I can trust myself to get the job done, and have this self motivated drive that puts all the pressure onto myself.  If there is no one else working with me I only have myself to blame.  I have been disappointed by enough people in my life to know that if I want to do something I will need to figure it out myself.  This is how I have been for years, but also something I have been changing in the last few years.

For years I have been working in a lot of areas with the impression that I am here to serve the world, but at the same time I am somewhat closed off to the world serving me.  Everything in this world needs a good balance.  The world works in conjunction with each other.  We need the good as well as the bad.  We need the pain to learn the love.  I need to learn how to receive as well as give.

The importance of being gentle on myself is to allow my soul to be less demanding.  I need to listen to the world and other people to help me be here in this moment.  If I am stretching into my forward bend I do not need to force myself into it.  I need to find a gentle heart and know that I am where I need to be.  Allow the patience and the trust that as long as I continue to practice good things in this world I am moving forward.